The SEXXX Tape...
This nation is fascinated with sex. I swear to god that all we do is wait for the next celebrity sex tape, salivating at the sound of the words Paris Hilton. Did that shock anyone, by the way? 1 Night In Paris? I mean, she had conceited porn star etched across her body.
The only thing that makes me sick is that regular people are making sex tapes as well. Like those 3 teens who "molested" the supposed teen slut from Cali. One of the boys "lost" the tape. But it makes me smile to know that all the right celebrities are making the sex tapes. Can you imagine if the Bushs made one? "His Helmet in Laura's Bush" (or if we're really unlucky, Martha). Here are a few sex tapes I hope never get made: The Olsesn Twin Incest Fest! Durst-y for more! Tipper's Zipper, Al "Choke her" Roker, 1 Night With Barbra Walters, The Cast of 60 mins, Shove it Lyle Lovett. Just to name a few.
But could you imagine? Stumbling across your parents' sex tape, or tapes? EEW!!!! Mom!!!! All the wrong mediocre people are making sex tapes then bitch when they don't get it. Coming soon is the Poet A. Demas Sex tape, in which I will fondle myself for 30mins until I orgasm and then bitch about the mess for and hour. Also coming soon is the digital binx sex tape, in which the fondle's himself for 30sec until he orgasms and then wipes it on his pillow....this is really gross to think about...damn you imagination....
But why would you want to make a sex tape? To see what you're doing wrong? Because other than that I don't see why you would want to make one. I can't imagine anyone saying, "Hey Honey, let's watch our sex tape so I can get all hot," or "I feel like jacking off, let me watch that sex tape with my girlfriend," because honestly, that's why porn was invented.
This is Poet Demas asking you to do us all a favor, keep the lens cap on....
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poet_demas) wrote,
amused
